Movember and Men's Mental Health: Slowing Down from Autopilot
- Evan Vukets
- 3 hours ago
- 5 min read
Every November, moustaches start to appear. Some are patchy and some impressive, but they all have a purpose. Movember began as a light-hearted way to raise awareness for men's health between two friends in Australia in 2003. Over time, it's grown into something much deeper. It serves as a reminder to check in on the men in our lives, and maybe even to check in on ourselves.
For many men, that second part is harder.
The Weight of Autopilot
I've worked with a lot of men who look like they have it all together. They're showing up for work, for family, for everyone who depends on them. On the outside, they're strong, capable, and responsible. Inside, it's often a different story.
They talk about feeling tired all the time. Not just physically, but in a quiet, heavy way that's hard to name. They describe being on autopilot. Days blend together. They've built a "good life" on paper, but don't always feel in it.
When we start to slow things down in therapy, a pattern often shows up. Many of us were taught that our worth comes from what we do. We fix. We build. We push through.
Those skills are valuable and they help us succeed. But when they're the only tools we use, they can also keep us from slowing down long enough to notice what's really going on inside.
Why Movember Matters
That's where Movember hits home for me. It's not just about growing facial hair or raising money, though those things matter. It's about creating space for men to step back and say, "How am I really doing?"
Because the truth is, men's mental health still carries a lot of internalized stigma.
According to the Movember Foundation, 1 in 4 men experience a mental health challenge each year, yet far fewer seek help. And while men make up about half of the population, 4 out of 5 suicides are men.
These aren't just numbers. They're fathers, brothers, sons, and friends. Men who tried to keep it all together until they couldn't anymore.
Redefining Strength
When we've been raised to believe strength means handling everything on our own, asking for help can feel like failure. But what if it isn't?
What if real strength isn't about pushing through, but about pausing long enough to listen to what's happening beneath the surface?
Sometimes that pause feels uncomfortable. For the men I work with, slowing down can bring up things that have been buried for years. Grief, pressure, loneliness, or the sense that they've lost touch with themselves somewhere along the way.
But that's also where things start to shift.
I've seen men reconnect with parts of themselves they had forgotten. The man who thought he had to carry everything starts to share the load. The one who only knew how to push forward learns to breathe again. Not just to survive, but to actually live.
You're Not Alone
If you're reading this and some of it sounds familiar, you're not alone.
Maybe you've felt that quiet restlessness. Maybe you've caught yourself snapping at the people you care about. Or maybe you just know you're running on empty, but you're not sure how to slow down.
You don't need to have it all figured out. You don't need to hit rock bottom before reaching out.
Sometimes the smallest step. Sending a message to a friend, booking a first counselling session, or just admitting, "I think I could use some help" is braver than suffering alone.
Taking the First Step
This Movember, the moustaches might grab the attention. But the real movement happens in the quieter spaces. In the moments when men choose to talk, to listen, and to take care of themselves in ways that go deeper than physical health.
If you're ready to step out of autopilot and reconnect with yourself, counselling can be a good place to start. It's not about fixing you. It's about creating space to slow down, understand what's happening beneath the surface, and begin to move toward something more grounded and meaningful.
At Eterna Counselling, we understand the unique challenges men face. Whether you're working with me or connecting with one of our experienced counsellors, you'll find a space where you can be heard without judgment.
Because you deserve that.
Support Movember
Want to get involved? Here are some ways to support men's health this November:
Donate to Movember: Support vital research and programs at Movember.com/donate
Start Your Own Fundraiser: Create a personal or team fundraising page at Movember.com
Learn More: Explore mental health resources and statistics at the Movember Foundation
Check In: Reach out to the men in your life. Sometimes a simple "How are you really doing?" makes all the difference.
Frequently Asked:
Is counselling really for me if I'm not in crisis?
Absolutely. You don't need to be in crisis to benefit from therapy. Many men come to counselling when they're functioning well on the outside but feeling disconnected, overwhelmed, or stuck on the inside. Therapy is about growth and self-understanding, not just crisis management.
What if I don't know what to say in a first session?
That's completely normal. Many men worry about this. Your counsellor will guide the conversation and help you explore what's going on. You don't need to have it all figured out, showing up is the hardest part.
How do I know if a counsellor is right for me?
It's important to find someone you feel comfortable with. At Eterna Counselling, we offer a free consultation so you can get a sense of whether we're a good fit. The therapeutic relationship matters, and it's okay to take your time finding the right match.
What makes men's mental health different?
While mental health challenges affect everyone, men often face unique barriers: social conditioning around emotional expression, pressure to appear strong, and stigma around seeking help. Working with someone who understands these dynamics can make a real difference.
How long does counselling take?
It varies. Some men benefit from short-term work (8-12 sessions) focused on a specific issue. Others find value in longer-term therapy for deeper personal growth. We'll work together to find what makes sense for you.
Is counselling confidential?
Yes. What you share in therapy stays in therapy, with very few exceptions (such as risk of harm to yourself or others). You can speak freely without worry.
Ready to take the first step?
Learn more about working with Evan Vukets, RCC or reach out to our team at Eterna Counselling to get started.
Evan Vukets, RCC is a Registered Clinical Counsellor at Eterna Counselling who specializes in working with men navigating life transitions, relationship challenges, and the pressures of modern masculinity. He creates a grounded, non-judgmental space where men can explore what's really going on beneath the surface. Connect with Evan →