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Yes, and this is actually one of the most common situations Kali works with. Complex or cumulative trauma — the kind that builds over years rather than stemming from a single incident — responds well to EMDR, though the process looks different than it does for a single event. The early phase of work focuses on building a solid foundation of safety and stability before any deeper processing begins. This isn't stalling — it's what makes the processing effective and sustainable. Healing complex trauma takes longer, but it's entirely possible, and you don't have to relive everything in detail to move through it.

Because willpower alone doesn't address what's driving the pattern. Most addictive behaviours aren't about weakness — they're about unmet needs, unprocessed pain, or nervous systems that learned to cope the only way they knew how. Kali's approach looks at what's underneath the cycle: the emotional triggers, the mental health overlap (anxiety, depression, PTSD), and the beliefs keeping you stuck. Using tools from SMART Recovery and an empowerment-based framework, the goal isn't to shame you out of old patterns — it's to build something more useful to replace them with.

Absolutely — and honestly, the earlier you come, the more there is to work with. Most couples wait until things have deteriorated significantly before seeking help, which makes the work harder. If you're feeling more like roommates than partners, having the same arguments without resolution, or noticing that emotional and physical intimacy have quietly slipped away, that's exactly what Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is designed for. The distance you're feeling isn't a sign the relationship is over — it's usually a sign that both partners have been caught in a cycle neither knows how to break.

This concern comes up often, and it's a valid one. Kali's approach is explicitly paced — meaning you will not be pushed into processing difficult material before you have the tools and stability to handle it. The early work focuses on building safety, grounding skills, and a strong enough therapeutic relationship that when you do move into deeper territory, you feel equipped rather than overwhelmed. With EMDR specifically, you also don't need to narrate your trauma in detail — the process works differently than traditional talk therapy, which many clients find comes as a relief.

That tangled feeling is incredibly common, and it's not something you need to sort out before coming to therapy — that's part of what the work is for. Kali's background in both mental health and addictive behaviours means she's trained to look at both at the same time rather than treating them as separate problems. Anxiety, depression, PTSD, and substance use or other compulsive habits often feed each other in a loop. Understanding that loop — where it started, what keeps it going, and what your specific triggers are — is where the work begins, and it's a lot more manageable than trying to tackle everything at once on your own.