Kayla Wild
REGISTERED CLINICAL COUNSELLOR (RCC)(CCC)(RSW)
Your relationship isn't failing.
It's struggling because you're holding it
together while slowly losing yourselves.
I'm Kayla, I'm so glad you're here! I'm a therapist in the Fraser Valley who works with couples navigating genuinely complex situations, first responders & employees at risk of or experiencing burn out with the mental toll of their work, individuals working through trauma & painful pasts. Maybe you're lying awake wondering if your relationship is as good as it gets, even though you have everything you thought you wanted. Maybe you're a first responder who can't turn off work mode, and it's destroying your personal life. Maybe you're stuck in the same patterns from childhood, exhausted from the critical voice in your head telling you you're not enough.
My Approach?
Understand, Process, & Plan
Whether you're navigating relationship challenges, processing occupational trauma, or working through patterns rooted in your past, the struggles you're facing make sense given what you've experienced. Healing doesn't mean returning to who you were before trauma or stress changed you. It means building a life that feels whole and meaningful within your current reality, changing the stories that keep you stuck, and creating genuine connection—with yourself, with others, and with the life you're building.
$170.00
COUPLES/FAMILY
$150.00
INDIVIDUAL
RCC
#20963
25+
AGES
RSW
#13440
Kayla works on a three-week rotating schedule to support flexible client availability. Please call or email to check current openings, dates, & times.
MAYBE YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE...
1
You're a Couple Who Feels More Like Roommates—or employees at risk of burnout.
You're adults (ages 25-60) in a committed partnership navigating blended family dynamics, first responder or healthcare work stress, or years of growing distance. Maybe, you're trying to sort out the do's and don'ts of blending a family.
You're managing work, household chaos, possibly kids, & falling into bed exhausted with important conversations left unsaid. You're coordinating logistics but barely connecting emotionally. Every conversation feels loaded, or you've stopped talking altogether because it always ends in a fight or painful silence. You're living parallel lives in the same house.
Key Areas:
-
Feeling like roommates—no intimacy, no connection, just co-existing
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Stuck in the same unresolved arguments
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Blended family chaos—loyalty conflicts, co-parenting with exes, step-parenting challenges
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Work stress (first responder trauma, healthcare burnout) bleeding into the relationship
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Betrayal, broken trust, or past wounds that haven't healed
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One foot out the door, considering separation but wanting to try everything first
I've worked extensively with couples navigating genuinely challenging circumstances. I don't focus on surface-level communication. I help you understand the deeper patterns, attachment wounds, and narratives driving disconnection. I'm trained in Gottman methods & have experience with blended families & couples at crisis points.
2
You're a First Responder or High-Stress Employee—And the Job Is Destroying You
You're a firefighter, paramedic, police officer, nurse, doctor, or EMT (ages 25-60), and what you've witnessed is affecting you in ways you can't explain to people who haven't lived it. You were trained to be competent and composed, but beneath the surface, you're running on empty. You're dealing with PTSD, vicarious trauma, or burnout.
Your schedule is irregular—shift work, long hours, on call. You're exposed to traumatic situations regularly & come home emotionally drained but unable to decompress. The hyper-vigilance doesn't turn off. You're managing the gap between who you are at work (competent, composed) and how you feel inside (exhausted, overwhelmed, numb). Your relationships are suffering because you can't be present when you're home.
Key Areas:
-
Can't turn off work mode—hyper-vigilance, emotional shutdown, always on edge
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Fear that admitting struggle will be seen as weakness or impact your career
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Relationships suffering—partner feels shut out, you feel misunderstood
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Feeling numb, detached, or losing yourself to the work
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Job culture doesn't support vulnerability, so it all lands on your personal life
I have specific training and extensive experience working with first responders. I understand vicarious trauma, PTSD, moral injury, and the culture of emergency services—the unspoken expectations, the hyper-vigilance that doesn't turn off, and what it means to carry the weight of what you've witnessed while maintaining the facade that you're fine.
3
You're Tired of Repeating the Same Patterns—And Ready to Write a New Story
You're an individual (ages 25-60) working through childhood trauma, attachment wounds, anxiety, or intergenerational trauma while trying to appear functional. You know your past shaped you, but you're ready to stop letting it define you. You're balancing work, relationships, possibly parenting, while managing anxiety or depression. You're navigating triggers you don't see coming & questioning decisions, relationships, & self-worth.
FNHA Clients: You're navigating intergenerational trauma and cultural disconnection while working to break cycles and reclaim your story.
CVAP Clients: You're healing from crime victimization—assault, violence, or abuse—working through to rebuilding safety & trust.
Key Areas:
-
Repeating the same patterns in relationships, work, and life no matter what you do
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Relentless self-criticism and feeling like you're never enough
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Trauma & intergenerational trauma showing up in how you relate to yourself and others
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Anxiety and depression making daily functioning exhausting
-
Feeling fundamentally broken or like your pain isn't "bad enough" to deserve support
I specialize in narrative therapy—helping you change the stories you tell yourself about who you are & what's possible. I actively help you give yourself permission to prioritize your well-being & challenge the narratives your used to.
WHO I WORK WITH:
I work with women, men, LGBTQIA+ individuals, couples, families, first responders, FNHA clients, and victims of crime, ages 25+.
1
Couples
(ages 25-60)
Couples navigating relationship challenges, blended family dynamics, first responder stress, communication breakdown, or crisis points who are ready to rebuild genuine connection and move from surviving together to actually thriving as partners.
2
First responders
(ages 25-60)
Front-line workers dealing with PTSD, vicarious trauma, moral injury, burnout, and the mental health toll of work that regularly exposes them to human suffering, tragedy, and loss while navigating a culture that expects them to suppress their emotional responses.
3
Individuals
(ages 25-60)
People working through childhood trauma, attachment, anxiety, depression, intergenerational trauma, and painful pasts who are ready to build lives around self-compassion. Including FNHA and CVAP clients.
WHAT WE'LL WORK ON TOGETHER:
Relationships & Communication
-
Understanding how early experiences and attachment trauma shape the way you show up in relationships
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Breaking cycles of pursue-withdraw, conflict avoidance, or constant fighting
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Rebuilding intimacy and partnership when you've been functioning as roommates
-
Navigating blended family dynamics—co-parenting, loyalty conflicts, step-parenting challenges
-
Creating new patterns that feel safer and more authentic
Setting Boundaries & Priorities
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Learning to prioritize yourself and your relationships without guilt (especially for women & mothers)
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Setting healthy boundaries with family, work, and external demands
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Challenging the belief that caring for yourself means you're selfish or neglectful
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Creating space for individual needs within relationships and family systems
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Understanding that boundaries actually strengthen relationships and mental health, not weaken them
Front Line Workers Trauma
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Processing vicarious trauma, PTSD, and the emotional toll of high-stress work
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Managing hypervigilance, emotional shutdown, and difficulty "turning off" work mode
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Navigating the impact of shift work and irregular schedules on relationships and mental health
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Creating sustainable ways to process trauma without overwhelming your personal life or sacrificing your career
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Building emotional regulation skills and finding meaning in the work without burning out
Narrative Work & Identity
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Changing the stories you tell yourself about who you are and what's possible
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Challenging limiting beliefs and narratives rooted in past conditioning
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Rewriting the narrative of your relationship from "failing" to "transforming"
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Understanding how past experiences shape your present reality
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Building a new identity—individually, in relationships, and in your life
Past Childhood Wounds & Healing
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Understanding how childhood trauma and complex pasts show up in adult life
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Breaking intergenerational patterns and attachment wounds
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Processing anxiety, depression, and the impacts of past trauma on current functioning
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Building self-compassion and challenging the critical inner voice
-
Creating new narratives about who you are and what you're capable of
Crisis Intervention & Relationships
-
Navigating infidelity, betrayal, and broken trust
-
Managing addiction or mental health issues impacting relationships
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Deciding whether to repair the relationship or separate with clarity and respect
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Processing years of accumulated resentment and pain
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Creating a path forward when you're at a breaking point
THINGS I WON'T DO WHEN YOU WORK WITH ME:
I won’t judge where you are. Whether it’s relationship strain or job-related trauma, it makes sense.
I speak plainly. No jargon. Just real explanations you can actually use.
I stay neutral. Couples therapy isn’t about blame—it’s about understanding.
I respect your pace. We don’t force healing or rush trust.
I work with you, not above you. You know your life—I help you make sense of it.
My Approach?
CONNECTIONS BEFORE CONVENTIONS
I work with a combination of approaches that focus on changing the stories you tell yourselves about who you are and what's possible, while building the practical skills you need to navigate conflict, set boundaries, and actually connect. We'll look at the patterns you've been stuck in—how past experiences and trauma show up in your relationships and your life—and work together to create something different. This isn't just about learning to communicate better or managing symptoms; it's about fundamentally shifting how you see yourselves and creating lasting change.
I specialize in complex dynamics that require more than generic advice. I combine evidence-based methods (Gottman for couples, narrative therapy, CBT, trauma-informed care) with a genuine understanding of what it's like to navigate first responder trauma, relationship crisis, and patterns rooted in painful pasts. I don't shy away from the hard conversations, and I won't give you surface-level solutions when you need deep transformation.
I DRAW FROM SEVERAL APPROACHES
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
Identifies and changes unhelpful thought patterns and behaviors to improve emotional regulation and develop practical coping strategies.
Solution-Focused Therapy
Focuses on your strengths and future goals rather than past problems, helping you identify what's already working and build on it.
Narrative Therapy
Helps you rewrite the stories you tell about yourself by separating your identity from your problems and discovering preferred narratives
Gotham Method
Evidence-based couples therapy that strengthens friendship, manages conflict constructively, & builds shared meaning in relationships.
Attachment-Base Therapy
Examines how early relationships shaped your attachment style and influences how you connect with others in romantic relationships, parenting, and friendships.
Trauma Informed Care
Recognizes how trauma impacts the brain, body, and nervous system, prioritizing safety, trust, and empowerment in the therapeutic relationship.
WHO I AM—BACKGROUND
DEGREES & EDUCATION
Master of Social Work (MSW)
University of Victoria
Bachelor of Social Work (BSW)
University of The Fraser Valley
Criminal Justice Diploma
University of The Fraser Valley
Social Services Diploma
University of The Fraser Valley
PROFFESIONAL REGISTRATIONS
Registered Social Worker (RSW)
#13440
Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC)
#20963
Crime Victim Assistance Program
First Nations Health Authority
SPECIALIZED TRAININGS
Narrative Therapy Level 1 & 2
Van.School of Narrative Therapy
Cognitive Behavourial Therapy
Gotham Method
Attachment-Based Therapy
University of The Fraser Valley
I became a therapist because I kept seeing people—good people, trying people—struggle under the weight of narratives that weren't even theirs.
They'd internalized stories about who they were supposed to be, how relationships were supposed to work, what it meant to be worthy of connection. Those stories were destroying them. I wanted to create space for people to question those narratives, to examine where they came from, and to intentionally write new ones that actually fit their lives. I wanted to help couples see the deeper patterns driving their disconnection. I wanted to support first responders in processing what they carry. I wanted to help individuals break free from limiting beliefs rooted in trauma. That's the work that matters to me.
I've navigated relationship endings, parenting challenges, career changes, financial stress, loss, and the impact of childhood trauma on adult relationships. I understand what it's like to question everything you thought you knew about yourself and your life. I know the exhaustion of trying to hold it all together while feeling like you're falling apart. And I know what it takes to do the hard work of building something new from the pieces. This isn't theoretical for me—it's lived experience that informs how I show up in the therapy room.
I've navigated career transitions that forced me to redefine my identity outside of what I "did" for work. I've experienced relationship endings that required me to grieve both the partnership and the future I thought I was building.
I've supported loved ones through addiction and mental health crises. These aren't just professional areas of expertise for me—they're lived experiences that inform how I show up, what I understand about pain and transformation, and why I believe so deeply in people's capacity to heal.
What I've witnessed again & again is that people don't fail relationships or struggle with mental health because they're not trying hard enough. They struggle because they're working from old scripts that don't fit their current reality. They're operating from narratives they internalized about what love should look like, what partnership means, what it means to be worthy of connection or capable of handling stress. When we can identify those narratives, examine them, and intentionally create new ones, everything shifts.
MY CORE VALUES
The stories you tell shape your reality—and can change it!
Whether you're stuck in a narrative about your relationship ("we're failing"), your capacity ("I can't handle this"), or your worth ("I'm not enough"), those stories become self-fulfilling prophecies. Narrative therapy is about identifying where those stories came from, examining whether they're still serving you, & intentionally creating new narratives that open up possibilities. This is transformative work—& it changes everything.
Trauma isn't your fault—but healing is your reclaiming!
You didn't choose the experiences that shaped you—whether that's childhood trauma, occupational trauma from first responder work, or relationship wounds. You're not to blame for how those experiences show up in your life today. But healing is something you can choose. It's hard, uncomfortable work, but it's also deeply empowering. I'll walk with you through it, but you're the one doing the work—and it's not something you have to do alone, it's something we can work on together.
Pattern awareness creates healthier connections.
Most relationship conflicts aren’t really about the surface issue. They’re rooted in attachment wounds, unmet needs, and patterns learned early in life. When couples understand what’s happening beneath the argument—and what each person is truly fighting for—everything begins to shift. This work isn’t about better communication skills; it’s about changing how you see yourself and each other.