Loss and grief have historically been seen as linear processes with a beginning and an end. Grief is often described as a series of tasks and stages where the bereaved must work through to “accept” their loss and “move on” from their loved one. But, let me tell you, you don’t have to let your loved one go or close the door on them. There is no reason why you cannot bring your loved one into the world today!
Despite being without the person we loved, we still feel the relationship and attachment to them, although it may change and transform as we move forward in life. This process looks different for everyone as there is no script or step-by-step process to follow. It is still possible to have a relationship with our loved ones even after they have passed, just in a different way. It can be as simple as…
- Making space to sit and have tea or coffee with your loved one, talking to them and asking for strength and guidance.
- Writing letters to them sharing all the things you normally would about what is happening in your life.
- Chat to them as you take the dog for a walk.
- Notice things in your day-to-day life that remind you of them and honour them by saying, “I’m thinking of you” or “remember when you used to do this or that”.
I find when we invite our loved ones into today, it feels less lonely and you get the freedom to create what that new restructured relationship looks like. This brings hope and a sense of connection with your loved one where you don’t have to say goodbye forever, just hello in a new way.
Thanks for reading,
- What have you been longing to tell your loved one who has passed? Go ahead and write a letter telling them all about it. Imagine what their response would be.
- Take some time to write out an introduction of your loved one as if you were presenting them to a new person in your life. Include things like favorite stories you have, some personality traits they held, and memories you have of them.