3 Lessons I Learned from 2020 that I’m taking into the New Year


I’m kind of over the whole ‘unprecedented times’ saying – it actually makes me a bit angry and my eyes roll just a little bit. I’m going to blame it on pandemic fatigue, fatigue to all things connected to this pandemic. Are you just as tired with this whole thing as much as I am? Follow along for the 3 lessons I learned from 2020 that I’m taking into the New Year.

I’d like to think that 2021 will be the beginning of regaining some of our lives back, but I know that nothing magical will happen at midnight on December 31st that will somehow transform this entire situation into something more palatable and exciting.

We all know that this pandemic is going to follow us into 2021 – like that weird cat pee smell that you cannot get out of your car. It will linger and it will hit you at the most inopportune times.

What can we do to make 2021 a little bit better?

Well, I can tell you that keeping the lessons of 2020 close at hand will help me keep a level head in the midst of chaos and change.

We don’t control shit.

If there’s one thing that this year has taught me is that I don’t really control much in life. I love the illusion of control, I mean don’t we all?!? We all love the illusion of setting goals, smashing them out and being in total control of all the aspects of our life. Grief taught me 4.5 years ago that I don’t have control over anything besides how I choose to show up for myself and others, and 2020 has taught me the same lesson yet again.

Instead of trying harder to grab hold the illusionary control, I’ve learned to lean into the flow of things. I know, sounds kind of hippie-dippy but trust me when I tell you that it works. It’s in the surrender of things that we are able to create space for the flow of things. It’s in the attempt to control that we inadvertently create restrictions because we hold on to an image of how we think things ‘should’ be instead of allowing the creative energy to create a new way.

Change is good, even when we hate it.

I hear so many people say ‘I’m not good with change’ or ‘I don’t do change’ – let me tell you a secret, you’re constantly in a state of change. We’re created to be in a constant state of change and adapt really well to all the change. We’re essentially created for change and evolution.

What we don’t like is change that feels enforced on us, instead of created by us.

Change is essential for growth and it can be a really good thing, even if it’s enforced upon you. There has been some great change due to this pandemic:

  • I’ve learned who my friends truly are
  • Which people have stepped up and shown up
  • Those who are selfish and self-centred have gone away
  • I’ve learned that sitting on the fence is no longer an option
  • I am being more mindful of my time and how I spend it
  • Discovering what I actually give a shit about
  • And… I’ve become more grounded in my values and who I want to be.

What changes have occurred for you that you’re thankful for?

We are strong and we are tired.

There have been so many memes floating around saying ‘you can do hard things’ – and although this is very true, at some point I wanted to say a good old f**k  you to all those memes!

I’ve been tired and exhausted from the never-ending demands of living in a prolonged stress state. My mind, body and soul are tired from all of it and all I want is to be on a beach someplace really warm, with an adult beverage in my hand, fun parties happening in the background while listening to the soft crash of the waves.

I know that you are strong and that you’re tired too. You don’t have to crush it. You don’t have to use your quarantine time to learn a new skill or organize your garage. In fact, you don’t have to do anything productive with your time besides keep your head above water and survive. We have adapted and it’s come at a cost to our mind, body and soul – deep tiredness that will take us time to recuperate from. But before we’re able to recover, we have to be on the other side of this first. So, give yourself a break, take some deep breaths and know that you’ll get to the other side.

What lessons are you taking from 2020 into 2021?

I would love to hear from you and have you share your lessons. The lessons don’t need to be profound to be meaningful, often the simplest lessons are the most powerful.


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